Thursday, February 3, 2011
Ella suffers from anxiety and depression since becoming a teenager, and it seems like no one understands her, especially her mother.
Ella: I don’t feel like writing don’t feel like writing don’t feel like writing my mother is making me do this she says I have to stop crying and this will help she says I have to write a whole page I don’t feel like writing I don’t feel like writing Mom what’s wrong with me? I feel like crying all the time, and sometimes I really want to do something, like, something fun, but I can’t get out of bed, I mean I can’t lie down either. I have all these ideas of things to do but I don’t want to do anything but I want to do something but I don’t know! Why are you making me do this Mom, it isn’t helping. I still feel frozen. I’m still crying. I don’t feel like writing. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I always love writing. I finished the first chapter of Saving Ella, which I know you want me to let you read
I don’t feel like writing I don’t feel like writing I don’t feel like
Oh I don’t want to draw either.
You don’t understand! Why won’t you listen to me? You say you can’t understand me if I don’t stop crying, but how can I stop crying if you don’t understand? Writing and drawing help you, they don’t help me.
I don’t feel like writing.
There, that’s a page.
I stopped crying, are you happy now?Oh. You probably are.